My ex husband has visitation with my oldest son every other weekend and though I am getting used to it, it never stops feeling like a whole in my chest when he isn’t around.
When you’re gone my heart is heavy,
My brain is useless, palms are sweaty,
I fear I’m always close to tears,
It’s only days, but I lose years.
When you’re around the house is loud,
You’re polite and smart, I am proud,
I feel like the mom you made me to be,
Whenever you are next to me.
There’s no proper way to explain the feeling of being separated from your child, no matter how short the time. It’s a hole in my heart and a lump in my throat. I’ve laid in his bed, I’ve stared at his room, I’ve cried into shoulders over his missing presence. Though I’m fully aware that come Sunday night I’ll have his little hands to hold and cheeks to kiss.